I’ve decided to just pick up the site where I left off. Revamping it is too much of a project for me right now, and I’d rather have something than nothing. As a wise woman once told me, “When you live your life ‘all or nothing’, you usually end up with a whole lot of nothing”: Words to live by.

At the moment I am still here in America. I am reacquainting myself with neighbors and other people from my past. I had been moving around partially to avoid these people because they reminded me of parts of my past about which I’d rather not think. My adventure now is to confront my ghosts from which I’ve been running and deal with them head on. If I can go across the world to help others, I can stay right here at home to help myself: At least for awhile.

It has snowed the past two days and my Mom and brother have used the snowblower to clear walkways not only for our house, but also for both of our next door neighbors. The snowblower is a wonderful invention. Oh, me, did I go out there? Heavens no! I go out to walk to the car, to take Licorice out for a pee and to walk across the alley to my neighbor’s house. I’m not what one would call “a fan” of snow. I don’t deal with it well at all. You would think being from here I would have developed a thicker skin for this sort of thing, but nope. I think my Irish roots are too ingrained in me – or I’m just a wuss.

I have absolutely had it with men. Sandy (my across the alley neighbor) and I are going to get sweatpants with the words “Guys, kiss my ass” printed on the butt with a graphic of lips on the side, as if to say, “yeah, right HERE!” Earlier in the week, Bryan’s ex called me from the Dominican Republic and essentially busted him out because he wasn’t being exactly straightforward with either one of us. He got defensive, yelled at me and I haven’t spoken to him since. The SAME DAY Ronan called me from Northern Ireland to chat. He wants to get back together, but I have been reticent to accept his plea. After he changed his mind the first half dozen times, a girl tends to get a bit skeptical. He said that it’s been four months, hasn’t he proven himself yet? No, I said, because the second I say yes to you, I fear I will get a call or email from you the next day saying to forget about it. He had bad news, though, telling me that his application to Work in Canada was denied. If he wants to really be together, I don’t know how it could work with us a world away.

Then there’s Mike. Mike is my old high school boyfriend who I was oh so in love with and thought I was going to marry. I had not spoken to him in ten years and we recently got back in touch. Mike and I fight like cats and dogs. I don’t know what the hell it is, but he can push my buttons like I’m a microwave oven and he’s aluminum foil, and in less than a minute I EXPLODE. Yesterday, as he was bitching and moaning about life, I asked if he wanted to hang out today. He said it would be nice to chill and forget about things for awhile. Accordingly, I phoned today and invited him over to cook with my Mom and me and he says, “what?” I recall the previous day’s conversation and he says, “I don’t remember saying that, and if I did, I didn’t mean it.” I told him to fuck off and go back to his miserable little life and that was that.

So when Sandy hears all this mess, she suggests hooking me up with someone. I give her the evil eye and tell her that right now, guys can kiss my ass! Hence, the sweatpants idea (which was Sandy’s, I just added the lips.) So girls, if you’ve had it with the b.s. guys are slinging our way, contact me to order your very own pair of ‘kiss my ass’ sweatpants! I’m sure they’re great to wear when plowing snow. ;-)